When It Rains

My driveway has an event horizon, beyond which nothing escapes. Not a basketball, not a small child, not a drop of water — go just over the lip at the top of the drive, and your next stop is in the garage. My house sits at the intersection of two hills. People come from miles around to marvel at how it has managed not to fall over.

That is not quite true, but it’s still awkward to live here. We own the house but gravity is our landlord.

Long story short — we had some flooding last year, and although we fixed the problem we had a minor wake-up call last week, so I still worry when it rains. Which took me outside all morning today to stare at the driveway, looking for sneaky runaway streams of rainwater. So far so good. I remain vigilant.

And it got me outside, something I’m not so vigilant about. I’ve been good this summer about taking my lap(s) around the house, but sunny and warm is easy. And I’m apathetic and lethargic a fair amount of the time, which is a familiar equation: A + L = Indulgence, which can go in either direction. I can over-indulge in a dumb art project I’ll never share with anyone, or with some food (not lately, maybe ice cream), or just doing something mindlessly (e.g., watching reels).

But sometimes I indulge in my apathy and lethargy, and that can keep me in. I just sit, like a slug, watching the walls do absolutely nothing. What I would give sometimes for a good wall hallucination.

I do get restless, though, and I have a system. Every time I don’t know what to do next, I do something that makes a difference in some way. I put a cup in the dishwasher. I pick up a scrap of paper, or sweep up some crumbs, or dust a shelf — anything that changes something nudges me toward a better place. 

Anyway. I guess that’s my coping tip for the day. “Do something.” I should have T-shirts made.

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For The New People: Here’s another longer story shortened — I really lost my taste for general public writing when I retired from the columnist business.

So I’m reluctant anymore to just toss stuff onto the internet conveyor belt for anyone to wander across. I like knowing generally to whom I’m offering my insights on staring at walls.

But the original audience for this newsletter (I guess it’s a newsletter; feels like a blog with an attitude to me, but whatever) consisted mostly of the people I’ve been sharing stuff with for the past couple of years. Another indulgence on my part — I grow dependent on people like every other human being ever, and I don’t want to take advantage. I’d rather no one person thinks, Am I the only one reading? Way too much reader pressure, lol.

So, welcome. I’m not sure what I’m doing here. I do think I’ve moved away from just long Covid all the time. I miss conversations, and I have a lot of things on my mind. I see the occasional TV show. I read a lot of books, and while my taste runs a little eclectic (i.e., random) they give me ideas, anyway. The Bronze Age collapsed for a reason, you know. I could explain.

I make a lot of videos I never show anyone. Maybe I’ll start posting them. They’re just ideas that went nowhere but were fun to try out.

And, if nothing else, I’ll surely tell you things as I enter my fourth year of a life I never saw coming. And still don’t, to be honest. I have no insight on the future, especially mine, but I’m getting better about appreciating one day at a time.

And I have coping tips. And possible T-shirts. So. It could be fun.